Good is in the eye of the beholder when it comes to something as subjective as sex or sexual prowess. What makes someone an ideal sexual fit for one person, might make them a horrible one for someone else. That’s where compatibility comes in. The closer you can get to an optimal level of compatibility with someone, the happier you’ll probably be with your love life, especially over the long term.
So, how exactly do you know whether someone you’re seeing is the sexual soulmate you’ve been looking for? Fantastic sex and plenty of it can be a good sign, but that’s not all there is to the big picture. Here’s a closer look at the hallmarks of true sexual compatibility that will really take you places in the bedroom.
You just seem to be in sync with one another.
Yes, communication is extremely important in any relationship, sexual or otherwise. But some connections require a lot more intentional verbal communication than others, especially in the bedroom. Others have a way of flowing intuitively without too much outside need for direction.
Of course, this isn’t to say that if your lover needs more direction instead of less, they don’t have soulmate potential. As relationships progress and you get to know one another better, you’ll find yourselves grooving perfectly with a lot less effort a lot more often. Compatibility is really about getting on the same page and staying there once things are flowing smoothly.
You’re equally invested in making your sex life incredible.
When the sex is great in a relationship, it’s only natural that you’d both be interested in exploring your overall bedroom potential. But with sexual soulmates, that thinking runs even deeper. A sexual soulmate isn’t just into what you’re doing. They want to know everything there is to know about you sexually so that they can satisfy you to the greatest extent possible. Of course, you’ll feel the same way about them.
You’ll also find adventurousness and sexual curiosity come relatively quickly to both of you. Have the two of you found it eerily easy to take your bedroom play to places you would have hesitated to explore with other people? Do you feel safe enough to want to experiment and expand even further? Does your sexual future seem bright, promising, and exciting on a level it didn’t before? If so, you just might be sexual soulmates.
You’re not afraid to ask for what you need.
Being sexually vulnerable with someone isn’t always easy. It requires trust, something that – in most cases – is difficult to build but very easy to break. It also calls for unconditional, total acceptance of one another. Some people are bolder than others when talking about sex or expressing their needs, but you’re only human. Before you can feel comfortable busting out all your kinks and pet fantasies, you have to know you’ll be able to do so without judgment.
So, how comfortable are you talking to your partner about your sexual needs? Are they good at listening when you tell them how you like to be touched or talk about what kinds of touch are most likely to result in orgasm? Are they open to things like switching up positions or bringing a toy into the mix if it will make sex more satisfying for you? And are they comfortable communicating their own needs to you in kind? When you’re genuinely sexually compatible, the lines of communication are always wide open, and you’re both comfortable with that.
Your stellar sex life is improving the rest of your life, as well.
When you add a positive new element to your life – up to and including an uncannily positive new sexual connection – other aspects of your life tend to improve in response, almost like magic. Great sex has a way of putting you in an unbelievably good mood, even outside of the bedroom. You’re cheerier, more patient, more accommodating, and more open-minded at work and in your social life, as well.
A great sex life also sends your confidence through the roof. There’s actually science out there to suggest that the more confident someone is in their sexual self, the more likely they are to be satisfied and secure in other aspects of their identity. Seriously, have you ever known someone who was having earth-shattering sex on the regular? They strut while practically oozing confidence. It’s something extraordinary to behold.
So, in a nutshell, if you strongly suspect you may currently be burning up the sheets with your sexual soulmate, there’s a good chance that you’re right. One’s intuition has a way of knowing about such things. If they’re trustworthy, attentive, sexually adventurous, and the perfect complement to your authentic self, you’ve got a keeper on your hands. Hold onto them!
