If you’re like many people, you’ve heard of fisting. You may even know a couple of people who’ve tried it themselves and weren’t shy when it came to talking about it. But what you may not know are the details as to what fisting is. That said, if you’ve always wanted to know, you’ve come to the right place.
Here we’ll satisfy your curiosity by covering what fisting is, as well as who enjoys doing it and why. We’ll go over what you need to know if you think it’s something you’d like to try yourself, as well, the better to make sure you have a positive first experience.
What Is Fisting?
Fisting is likely exactly what you think it is. It describes a sex act in which the giving partner uses their entire hand (or fist) to penetrate the receiver’s body. As with intercourse, this can of course be done either vaginally or anally.
And what do those who enjoy fisting get out of the experience? Those who like to be fisted love the feeling of ultra-deep penetration, as well as the sensation of absolute fullness that comes with it. And those who enjoy fisting their partners love the thrill of pushing their partner to their limits in a way they genuinely enjoy.
Fisting is also something you can explore on your own as a new way to upgrade your solo experiences. Some people are limber enough to use their real fists to penetrate themselves. But if you’re not, there are penetrative toys and dildos shaped liked fists that are ideal for duplicating the unique sensations involved.
How to Approach a First Fisting Experience
Fisting naturally isn’t for everyone, so it’s either something that appeals to you and your partner or it isn’t. If it does sound like something you could get on board with, it’s important to approach things properly. Here are some tips to keep in mind as you and your partner explore fisting for the first time.
Talk it through completely
Consent is an important part of any shared sexual experience, so you should never spring something new on a partner without discussing it first. This is especially the case when it comes to something like fisting that may push someone’s boundaries further than they’re used to.
Don’t put your partner on the spot by asking about it while you’re already in the middle of having sex (or getting ready to). Instead, bring it up for discussion some other time and be prepared to accept whatever your partner’s answer is.
Engage in some hand care first
If you’re the one who’ll be performing the actual fisting, make sure you do a little courtesy prep work on your hands first. It should go without saying, but it’s imperative that you make sure there’s nothing sharp or rough on your hands that could potentially hurt your partner or make the fisting uncomfortable in the wrong ways.
That means no long fingernails or rings. You shouldn’t have any hangnails, rough cuticles, or jagged fingernail edges, either. In fact, a nice manicure is more than just a great way to take care of your hands. It’s excellent fisting prep, too.
Don’t skimp on the lube
Lube is a pleasure seeker’s best friend when it comes to literally any penetrative sex act. And the more challenging the act, the more important it is to be extremely liberal when it comes to lubing up.
So don’t skimp. Use more than you think you really need and consider choosing an extra pillowy formula designed with more challenging acts (e.g., anal) in mind. They work great for fisting, as well.
Take your time
Even a body that’s pretty used to fisting needs a minute to ease into things and relax enough to make full penetration possible. And if it’s someone’s first time, patience and discretion are extra important.
Start slow and small with just a couple of fingers at first. Then add a couple more fingers followed by your thumb. Then you can try duck-billing your hand and attempting to ease it into your partner. Keep in mind that it may take time to work your way all the way up to a full fisting experience.
Last but not least, keep the lines of communication open throughout every stage of your experience. If you’re receiving, make sure your partner knows whether what they’re doing feels good, feels uncomfortable, etc. And if you’re giving, keep checking in with your partner and making sure they’re not only okay, but enjoying what’s happening.
And when you’re done, talk about it some more. How did you both feel about what just happened? Is it something you’d be open to doing again? What would you do differently next time? Then use what you learned from your first experience to make each subsequent experience even better.
